I should have been dead!

Alcohol is faithful to deliver a blanket of foggy insensitivity in our brain.  We are unable to feel reality quite so harshly. A numbing process cradles our experiences and dampens our hurtful memories and after a few drinks then allows us to party with abandon and believe the lie that there are those around who really care for you. However, most around you are battling their own damaging mindsets and dancing in the shadows too while filled with the persuasion of becoming anesthetized so they too cannot feel the pain of rejections quite so clearly.

This could be one reason why there are those who drink excessively or do drugs. Their minds are saying, “Make the hurts go way, please!” Escaping at the bottom of a bottle or the end of a toke will not bring amends, truth or answers. In fact, sooner or later we will have to stop lying to ourselves and ask what we are doing. I have learned that what we do not conquer in our youth - will have to be conquered later or the weakness will conquer us.

Long ago in my youth, I was such a person. I sought after understanding with the other barflies. It was good to be with likeminded friends at the “watering trough.” But the time came one late night when I was driving home from a bar after one too many drinks when speeding around a curve way too fast; I saw the blaring lights of a car in my lane heading straight towards me. Everything happened in seconds as I quickly jerked my vintage 1953 VW bug over into the other lane and started to spin. Somehow I managed to see the other car race by me and as I tried to stop the spins I jerked the VW into the opposite direction and rolled my VW bug over 3 times. This was back before the days of seatbelts and as the bug crashed with every bounce I kept thinking to myself; “I’m going to be alright! I’m going to be alright!”  Did I call upon the Lord at that time? Not when I was flying and crashing. Then I heard the shrillness of a woman’s fearful scream that pierced sharply within the vehicle’s brutal activity, yet; she was completely invisible in the thick dark night.  Everything seemed surreal to me. Was this really happening? My thoughts were: “Who was that and what was she screaming about? Oh, it must be me!” My door ripped violently apart in mid-air and before the third ruinous hammer, I was thrown out of the car and laid upon the side of the road unable to move my legs. I then can recall crying out to the Lord and saying “Oh God, please not that!” Then, immediately I moved my toes, feet, legs, arms and slowly got up and stood as the police and ambulance came. Now sobered, I would later discover to be discolored with one big giant purple bruise from head to toe, but I was fine. It was a good thing I was thrown out because my VW was flattened and squashed like a pancake. The authorities said I should have been killed and that they had never seen anyone walk away from such an accident.

Not only could I have been killed, but I could have killed someone else; or seriously maimed someone for life. And, to think I brought all that upon myself.  I was at fault and could not blame anyone else over such rebellion. Did the screaming woman pray for me? Was she the one who called the authorities? Some things we won’t find out until much later.

My life is filled with God’s never-ending grace.  Filled with the love of God and His forgiveness that I do not deserve and today I live and breathe for the God who rescues those whose lives are lonely and hurting. He is the God of all comfort who pulls you out of your pit then, embraces you right where you are at in your life.  The power of His love washes you clean from the scars of your past! I have plenty of scars, but they can no longer be seen from the visible eye because when God heals, He takes all the mental anguish and lying spirits away.

I write these things because I know there are those who are where I once used to be in my life. If I can offer hope in your life, then I have done what I’ve set out to do.  There is freedom in accepting Jesus as your Savior because He is truth and the truth brings you into the light and sets you free!  You are escorted into the light (remember God is love and God is light) and you will be able to see things clearer as He gives you divine understanding. 

I urge you today to accept Jesus Christ as your Savior and allow Him to do a work inside of you. Allow His Holy Spirit to open up the Word of God in your life and set you free and give you a new life with a new identity in Him. You will see things completely differently as you grow in God.

The time has come not to put off another day, week or year. How do we know when our heart will stop beating? How do we really know what the next minute will bring in our lives? When I was in that accident I wasn’t ready to Passover yet. I shudder to think what would have happened to me if I had been ushered over into the other side.

You might say: “But you do not know what I have done in my past. I have done so many things that I could never be worthy enough to come to God and ask forgiveness.”

And, I would say to you: “None of us are worthy within ourselves. We have all sinned and missed the mark of salvation in our lives and we all walk through this same door. This is why Jesus was sent as a sacrifice for you and me. There isn’t anything that is too wicked or bad that cannot be washed away by the blood that He shed upon that cross. But you must believe that He is the Son of God and sent for the world (you and me) and accept this free gift of salvation that He offers. When you humble yourself and confess your sins and repent, God hears your prayer and throws all your sins in the sea of forgetfulness.

And so, ask yourself if you passed away right this second, do you know with certain where you would go? We cannot earn the salvation that God offers, because as I mentioned, salvation is a free gift.  All God asks is for you to believe in your heart by faith to accept that His son Jesus Christ was a sacrifice for you. Eventually, your faith will be followed by works because of the great love that you have found. When you love someone, you talk about them and want to do things for them. This is the way true believers feel about the Lord. Although we cannot see Him visibly in our lives, we cannot deny He is there because of what He has done upon our behalf. When you accept the Lord and grow, your life will change dramatically.

Let’s Pray:

Heavenly Father,

I feel so wretched. I have sinned greatly and need forgiveness. It seems everything I do is wrong and I cannot seem to undo those things. I need a Savior. I need love! I need strength! I need help and for you to open up my eyes. I need to understand about your son Jesus Christ that I keep hearing about. Please forgive me when I (name your sins). Please come into my heart and live inside of me. Deliver me from myself! From my bad habits! Deliver me from a sinful life! Send godly people my way to help me become strong and lead me to that place where you would have me grow up in you. In Jesus I ask amen.

For he said, “I have answered you in an acceptable time and in the day of salvation I have helped you.” Behold, now is the acceptable time, and behold, now is the day of salvation. 2Co. 6:2 Aramaic Bible.