Loneliness
Not everyone is singing carols this year.
We have:
Singles, widows, divorcees and those living in an onslaught of miscommunications and misunderstandings. Abusive situations, some are in mourning, sons and daughters who are on tour in the military, miscarriages, abortions, loss of a job and those who have lost a pet [yes we love our pets]. Unless we’ve walked in their shoes, we cannot grasp such sorrow.
Overspending gives into the lure of department stores. Oh oh, bills and more bills. Oh no! Medical bills, now what! And, whats the drip drip drip in the basement and now, we need a new roof!
We did not expect all this!
What did you say it would cost?
You have got to be kidding me!
Of all things, grandma doesn’t think we love her because she hasn’t heard from us in awhile, but she doesn’t know what has been going on in our house. “The youngest one has the measles, Tom brought home failing grades and Susan is running around with the wrong crowd! Why won’t they listen to me? Who can I talk to? Help!
What made grandma begin to think that way? My Pastor calls them “triggers.” I love that expression because of the simplicity of the definition! Grandma may have started to get angry because she started to feel left out, lonely and that no one cared. She started to think [trigger] in the wrong direction of self-pity instead of what her kids could be going through. One phone call would have given her the peace and understanding she needed.
Was grandma listening to a friends chatter about her daughter phoning her with holiday plans? Was this the trigger thought that set off envy, sparking anger, bringing in heaviness that finally rested into self-pity? Grandma should have been happy for her friend. Instead she followed the “me” steps into believing a lie. She became miserable.
Loneliness pretends, and can be briefly covered up by an occasional smile. And in todays modern trendy terminology; happens to be “gender friendly.” [Jesus never talked about something being “gender friendly.”] Too much self focus [triggers] opens the door for depression and when we allow this to happen; sometimes hope begins to dwindle because we have chosen to believe a lie, instead of truth.
Don’t have anymore hair? Well, maybe you needed more character and happen to be more unique without it!
Gained a little too much weight? There’s your challenge to reach for an apple instead of a donut.
Stage fright? It is only a spirit of fear. Walk boldly through it and it leaves!
Fighting jealousy? Train your mind to begin to magnify and admire the good things in that person.
Feeling unloved? Love! Love all those around you with everything you have inside of you! Everything you sow will be returned in mega amounts.
We will be happier if we stop taking ourselves so seriously. I was talking to my Pastor yesterday about a problem. He has what I call, clear periwinkle blue eyes that twinkle. A good transparent sign! When I got back into my car and looked into the mirror and saw two raccoon eyes looking back at me. My eyeliner had smudged all over my eyes because I usually close my eyes when I pray. How embarrassing. Then, on second thought; “well he sees a lot more than two black eyes when he talks to people and it made me laugh.” I chose to let it go.
You may be alone, but that doesn’t mean you have to be lonely. Sometimes it can be because, you have chosen to move from the presence of God into your own fleshly thoughts and feelings.
You will show me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore. Psalm 16:11
Exactly what kind of fruit are we producing when we experience our flesh demanding our soul to overspend for those we love? In times past, we have called this love. For whom? Why have we put a worldly price tag upon love? Why do we play this game of consumerism, every single year! And, where is our priorities?
The best thing you can give is yourself. Jesus taught us this very thing.
Many years ago, one of my best friends went against the tide and always baked cookies and sent them to her family. Why stretch your budget and stress about it afterwards? There are other ways to give besides going into debt every year.
This also means to stop comparing yourself with others and be the person who God has created you to be. Just be yourself. The Creator did not make a mistake. There is only one you on this whole planet and this means you are special.
Admit that you aren’t thinking right and it is your faulty thinking processes that have isolated you in the first place. Whenever something happens, I am always aware there are many others who have gone through the same thing or worse. The difference is always in the attitude of our response.
Need friends? The solution: Be friendly.
“A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly:
and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.”
Don’t like the tinsel in the stores? Don’t go there, bake cookies or make fudge instead. Dare to be different! Teach your children/grandchildren the true value of living is giving themselves.
“Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth.” Colossians 3:2
Develop a new habit and pray in thankfulness before the beginning of everyday. Learn to pray the word. Such as:
“You are my God, and I will praise you! You are my God, and I will exalt you! Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good! His faithful love endures forever.” Psalm 118:28-29, NLT
Joy will come, because you have entered into the presence of God and put Him back in his rightful place in your life.
“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
1 Thessalonians 5:18, NIV
“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe”... Hebrews 12:28, NIV
“For all of this, Your Excellency, we are very grateful to you”. Acts 24:3, NLT
Put yourself on a shelf. This holiday, reach out to others and sow love to those around you.
Let’s pray:
Heavenly Father,
We are so thankful for your goodness in our lives. We put our trust in you and give you all of our problems. We know you are always here working upon our behalf. We know, you hear our prayers. Thank you Father. Help us to continually think of the solutions in your word, give us the answers we need to make godly decisions to benefit those around us. Remind us to always put your ways before flesh gets in the way and we ask you put a wall up to prevent us from getting involved in any worldly ideas that would hinder our walk with you. We cherish your character and desire to draw closer to you in every way in our lives. We give you honor, glory, and all of our love. We give you this day and rejoice over every breath you have given to us. We ask that you would continue to guide and direct us to give good words, do good things, think good things to give you pleasure. Thank you Father and we pray in your son’s name Jesus. Amen.
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