Anger is Just Like an Ole Batch of Fudge

Anger is just like an Ole Batch of Fudge

Anger is just like an old batch of fudge. But, I’m not going to get to the chocolate right away, because first we’ve got to talk about how this whole process develops inside of us.
Someone you thought cared about you comes along and either says the wrong thing or does something against you and offends you. Worst still, your feelings become injured as you are reduced to tears, your heart breaks inside. You actually feel ill and in pain. How could they see this in me? How could they even say that? How could they have done that to me? Then, before you know it, the more you think about the whole situation, the larger the problem looms. There is a little stirring that begins to happen within your mind. The more you think about the offense, the more upset you get rehashing the incident; you’ve now developed full feelings of anger. You walk around doing your daily tasks thinking about this unrighteous indignation done to you and you certainly did not deserve. By the end of the day, you have a different awareness, one of emptiness, downheartedness and gloom. You’ve become discouraged and depressed.
But it isn’t over yet, because; you feel like you’ve been betrayed and you still have this anger gnawing away inside of you. This time it is coupled with resentment and yes, you have invited everyone to your pity party; only trouble is, no one comes to dine except you. You’ve come to a decision and decided you will not allow that person to ever hurt you again and begin to put up your shield. This shield of protectiveness comes in one size fits all and calls itself by many words like: unpardonable, irremissibly or condemnable. What the shield is really saying is that the crime has become unforgivable and you’ve just set yourself up as judge and jury to pass this over to the condemned criminal who had no right to trespass on the affection of your soul. And this is true, whoever the culprit is.
You’ve gone through the tears, the anger, the resentment and the depression while holding on to your shield of unforgiveness. Only now, friends have discovered a new insensitivity about you. They notice a hardening happening and how you talk about the incident all of the time and it seems to be the main topic when you get together with them. Your face is etched with deep lines developed through a clenching and grinding your teeth, whenever you see the offender. Every once in awhile you begin to feel a tenderness towards the offender, but you stiffen and choose to ignore those feelings because you’ve hardened your heart and you’ve done this so many times it’s become habit forming. After all, you cannot let down your shield. What you do not realize is that a root of bitterness has formed within the soil of your soul and with every recollecting thought brings weed feed for it to grow that much more. “Oh the pain, you think to yourself. I would have never done that, if it had been me. I have given my best years to that person and look what they did to me anyway. “
As if things could not get any worse, they did; because now you feel as if you are in a cage and being tormented. It is like a prison without bars. You feel depleted and lack the confidence you once had and find yourself looking in the mirror to see if you really measure up with today’s society. You watch and hear about your offender laughing and having fun, yet you are miserable and cannot seem to break out of these chains.
How did you get into this mess? And what is the solution and how on earth can this be like an ole batch of fudge?
First let me extend some kind of hope to you and say you are not unique in your problem. I do not know the statistics but I would roughly guess that there are more people out there who are angry then those who aren’t. This includes even those sold out faith filled believers who declare victory through the love of the Lord. Look at the way people drive on the road these days. They aren’t just angry, they are incensed. Their blood pressure probably looms in the high risk zone as they continue to speed on into a frenzied mania trying to take control of the pavement they are driving on. They weave in and out of traffic, cutting in front of you while blowing their horn if you don’t speed quickly away when the light turns green in the timing that is perfect for them. Their anger is vented towards you, but you are not their initial problem, only their victim for the moment. They are ones who have been nurturing and fertilizing their bitterness into an almost volcanic response. We are living in a society overflowing with anger. Why are we so surprised when someone completely flips out and goes into a restaurant and shoots everyone in there? They vented their anger back into an anger filled society from whence it came in the first place. Did you know that anger is contagious? Same as enthusiasm, but one disrupts and gives through destroying and the other gives through blessing and inspiring.
How can anger be like an ole batch of fudge? Let’s think about the ingredients you put into making fudge. First mix the sugar, milk and chocolate. Sugar is sweet and good to the taste, oh so enticing yet so deceiving. Come to find out, too much sugar isn’t really that good for us at all. Sugar turns to fat. Fat adds weight on you. Milk and chocolate isn’t bad, it is what we add to it that is harmful. So, we put these ingredients into a large pot, turn the heat on and let it boil for awhile until it gets to the soft ball stage. The heat from anger makes you boil doesn’t it? Remember, we added that sugar that is going to make it harden. The fudge won’t harden without the sugar. We just boil and simmer until it all hardens and before long we have creases on our face that gives a picture to what is going on inside of us.
The fudge is ready for the butter and vanilla and is taken off of the burner and placed aside to come to room temperature. Then, when at room temperature is beaten until it thoroughly thickened, or hardened enough to slice.
The butter and vanilla is the resentment and depression and when hardening comes along, the root of bitterness has been productive because you chose to keep it. The beating is the torture you experience in this prison. The hardening is the end product of a conscience refused to listen to God’s small voice on this whole matter.
This brings me to what happens to your body when you choose this hardening (bitterness) in your life. As you choose to listen to yourself instead of what God says, there is a hardening going on all over yourself. A hardening in your face, the hard anger in your mind and even in your arteries that brings plaque that causes high cholesterol and that can be a contributing factor to high blood pressure leading to a stroke or heart attack.
All that you ask? Everything has to do with our attitude and everything we do is a choice for our soul to make. God never said our road would be a smooth one, but He did promise to be with us until the end.
Yes, you’ve had quite an offense done to you and before it is all over will no doubt have quite a few more. Isn’t it time to respond in a healthier, wiser way instead in the unforgiving selfish way? Don’t you want to be set free from your past choices that haven’t worked for you?
Solutions:
1. Humble yourself and admit you have a problem. Go tell your pride to take a hike. It isn’t your pride that is going to get you out of this one.
2. Begin to look around a little bit and notice just
how many people are struggling in their lives. Think about the blessings in your life and stop emphasizing all the negatives. Think about what you can do to help them out; a good word, an invite over for a dinner, babysitting or just being a listening ear. You like to be listened to when you are feeling bad. Make a do list.
3. No matter who has done the wrong, it is time for you to go to the perpetrator and make amends if possible. It is time to take that big step and approach and be approachable. It is time for you to release your anger within accordance to what Mt.18:15 says “Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone; if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained they brother.” Do not accuse. Be in a spirit of love and gentleness when you speak. When you go, be as willing to recognize your faults and shortcomings when you begin to point out his. If he confesses his sin or doesn’t, forgive and forget it. It is time to “let it all go, once and for all.” Do not hold his sin against him. Anything you fail to forgive will be detrimental to your physical and spiritual well-being, not his.
4. The Christians should always be the first one to make the move. Do not wait for him to come to you. We are called to heal, not destroy. To live, not die and to love not fear.
5. You have differences and always will have. Begin to overlook faults and use self-control. Many things are so small, we need to learn to just “let things go” and leave it at that. Don’t bring it up again.
6. Problems are going to come up and should be dealt with on a day to day basis, if they build up there will eventually be a venting process that could be very explosive. Any problem that comes up should be short lived.
7. Confess to God and to each other your faults. Ask Him to forgive you and to help you. And believe you have been heard.
Somewhere along the line a faulty thinking problem developed inside of you and you felt good holding onto this ploy of forgiveness. You became too self important and introspect, instead of caring for others.
But it is never too late to turn over that leaf.
If you have read this all the way to the end and thought to yourself, “I have so much bitterness inside of me. I just cannot ever imagine being able to forgive for what was done to me. No one understands my deep hurts or loneliness. I just do not think I am strong enough to follow all that through.”
Or, you may be thinking “I wasn’t raised a Christian. I do not understand them. When I see them, they all look like they are after money. My folks were against them.”
Once again you could be thinking, “How? You gave the solutions, but I don’t’ understand this Jesus thing. Besides, I’ve done so much in my life, how could anyone love me or forgive me? Especially God?
Those are just three examples of the thoughts of people who need Jesus Christ. I am sure if you have read this, yours might be unique and different. But that is the good news, as God is not partial to whom His Son’s love extends to. At the time of Jesus Christ’s crucifixion there were many put to death every day, so it was a common way to die. The difference with Jesus was that He was sinless when He died. He was the Son of God who left heaven to preach the good news to everyone who had ears to hear. He laid His life down for you and me. He had a way of escape, but chose to obey His Father God instead. The Bible calls Him “the lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world.” Jesus was a sacrifice for our sins. In the Old Testament the Hebrews sacrificed many animals in accordance to their many different sins on an altar to God. This was the Old Covenant of laws. There was a sacrifice with an animal for the sin. The New Testament became the New Covenant of Grace. Jesus is that Grace. He took our place, so we could have forgiveness of all our sins and receive eternal life. All those accepting Jesus as their Savior are His. And, all those who are His, are Gods. It is an act of faith when you receive Jesus. The Bible says “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.” Ep. 2:8-9
The whole picture of God and His son Jesus is one of love. “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved. He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hateth not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. And this is the condemnation that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. For everyone that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved. But he that doeth truth cometh to the light,that his deeds may be made manifest, that they are wrought in God.” Jn3:16-21
Do you feel you’ve just got too much knowledge to accept this God of Israel? Do you feel that you understand the scientific equations of the evolvement of life here on earth and this scenario is a little bit archaic and too historic for you? In other words, the knowledge you have accumulated makes so much more sense than a story about a Savior who died for our sins so we could be set free.
Did you know, the Bible talks about people like you? The Bible also talks about people like me too. When I first came to the Lord, I didn’t understand it all either; I came without total understanding; but I reached out to the love He was extending to me because that was the biggest thing I understood when I read the Bible. I discovered that He loved me and accepted me right where I was at, in spite of myself and in spite of all my sins of shame and I had so much shame. He even took that away inside of me and He will do it for you too, if you only choose to believe that Jesus died for you too and say a prayer accepting Him as your Lord and ask forgiveness. We’ve all messed up, we just need forgiveness to have peace of mind. The wonderful thing about this peace is that it comes from God and few people can understand it.
I urge you right now, to get on your knees alone and ask God to open up your eyes to understanding and bring Him into your life today and may His blessings of mercy and truth follow you from now on.
Williams@2006